


Above Everything Else

by sheryl_sems



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Anomaly Hallucinations, Bellarke, Clarke Griffin will never give up on Bellamy Blake!!, F/F, F/M, Past Clarke Griffin/Lexa, The 100 (TV) Season 7 Speculation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:08:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24445579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sheryl_sems/pseuds/sheryl_sems
Summary: Just as she's about to enter the anomaly on a rescue mission, Clarke decides she can't fight anymore. If more death was all that was waiting on the other side, she didn't want to go any further. A face from her past refuses to let her give up. Especially not if Bellamy Blake needed her.
Relationships: Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin
Comments: 6
Kudos: 56





	Above Everything Else

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This idea came to me very randomly and while I was never a Clexa shipper, I loved Lexa and acknowledge that Lexa was an important part of Clarke's past and it's likely she would see someone like her in a hallucination when on the verge of giving up. But my heart was and will always be with Bellarke and therefore I give you a little fusion- of Clarke's past urging her to fight for her future. It's not a very well thought out piece, more of me just wanting to get my random thoughts and ideas out there, so I'm sorry in advance! Also the hallucinations are probably not how the anomaly works but hey! Octavia did say that we dont know how the anomaly works so maybe it is?! Small spoilers from episode 1 and 2 in this fic.  
> Enjoy my friends!! xx

Clarke knew that being at the edge of the anomaly could cause hallucinations. Hope had warned them. _Stay together, stay vigilant._ But her breath still stuttered. Her heart still picked up pace. Tears still gathered in her eyes. She still stared and stared and _stared._  
  
  
“Lexa?” She whispers and the figure in front of her smiles softly. “Is this- is this real?”  
  
  
“What do you think?” Lexa drops to one knee in front of her and meets Clarke’s eyes. “You didn’t follow the others through?” Clarke’s eyes flit past Lexa’s shoulder and towards the deep green and bright yellow at the centre of the anomaly.  
  
  
“I- I can’t,” Clarke confesses, tears spilling over her cheeks and fingers burying into the soil by her knees, upon which she is sitting crumpled. She chokes back a sob, dropping her head. “I’m so _tired_.” Her fingers were still stained red when Raven had helped her put on the anomaly suit. The clothes she had on under the suit were still sticky wet from blood and pressing into her skin. The blood that had seeped into her shirt as she had rescued a severely injured Madi from Shade Heda’s clutches. The blood that had splattered onto her neck and arms as she shot him repeatedly until she was sure he was dead.  
  
  
“I’m so tired of fighting,” Clarke says, tears falling onto the forest floor. “I can’t do it anymore.”  
  
  
“Clarke kom Skaikru, I did not take you to be a quitter,” Lexa says, though her words are gentle. Clarke lifts her head to look at the warrior in front of her, wonders if she is finally, _finally_ at peace in death. Wonders if that’s the only way she can attain it too.  
  
  
“Wherever we’re going, there’s just going to be more death,” Clarke whispers. “I don’t want that anymore.”  
  
  
“Wherever you’re going, there’s going to be Bellamy.” Lexa’s words make Clarke’s eyes fill up once more and she squeezes them shut. “You left him behind once, Clarke, don’t make the same mistake again.”  
  
  
“The others will find him. Echo will find him.” She _hopes_ and _hopes_ because her legs won’t move and her hands stay rooted into the ground and her heart _aches_.  
  
  
There’s silence for only a moment before she hears, “Get up, Clarke.” If she remained here, would she get to see Lexa forever? Or would the anomaly disappear, taking her away once and for all? “Clarke. Get. Up.” She opens her eyes and Lexa is standing, a fierce expression on her face. “I said get _up!_ ”  
  
  
“I can’t fight anymore.” And she knows she has never sounded weaker, never looked smaller. But she also had never felt more defeated than she did just then.  
  
  
“The Clarke Griffin _I_ knew never stopped fighting for the people she cared about. _Especially_ not Bellamy Blake,” Lexa states.  
  
  
“What if he isn’t on the other side? What if I’ve lost him forever?” Clarke cannot imagine a world without him. She doesn’t want to. But she needs to accept that it’s a very real possibility that they won’t find him once they step through the anomaly.  
  
  
Lexa scoffs and Clarke’s eyebrows furrow at the reaction. "You waited six _years_ for him, when you didn’t even know if he was alive. You called him every single day on the radio, even though you didn’t know if they had made it to the Ring on time. You had hope that you would see him again even though there was a chance they could never make it back to Earth.” And Clarke’s about to ask her how she could have possibly known all of this but then she remembers that she shared Madi’s memories. Madi, who listened to all her stories about the boy who had put his hand over hers and said _together_ , and stood by her ever since. Madi, who had heard every radio call, even though she pretended like she wasn’t listening. Madi, who had asked her if she loved him and even though Clarke hadn’t responded, the answer was startlingly obvious to both of them.  
  
  
Or perhaps Lexa knew because she was a hallucination from Clarke’s own mind. And there has been nothing clearer to Clarke, through every battle she had ever had to fight, than the fact that she loved Bellamy Blake and would go to the ends of the earth for him (as she had already).  
  
  
“You’re a fighter, Clarke, so get up and _fight_ ,” Lexa says and Clarke can feel her limbs again, moving just enough in preparation of unfolding from the ground. “Bellamy needs you now more than ever.”  
  
  
And so she stands. Because while she would have liked to stay where she was and eventually return to the now-quiet Sanctum where her daughter waits, she knows she can never turn away from the boy in question. Because above everything else, Bellamy Blake was her greatest weakness. He always had been and perhaps he always will be.  
  
  
She stands facing Lexa now, who is smiling once again. Softly, gently, the way she had been the night before she died. And she wants to stay here for ever, in the comfort and safety of her own hallucination.  
  
  
“Go, Clarke,” Lexa says, stepping aside.  
  
  
“Will I ever see you again?” Clarke asks, and doesn’t allow herself to feel stupid about it. Because Lexa was gone, and so was the city of light, and so was the chip of the Commanders. And soon would the anomalies be gone too.  
  
  
“I’ll always be with you,” Lexa says. Clarke nods, blinking away the last of her tears and stepping towards the heart of the anomaly.  
  
  
“And Clarke?” She turns to see Lexa slowly disappearing within the green flames. “Love is not weakness. It’s your greatest strength.” Clarke watches her disappear before slipping on her helmet and allowing the anomaly to whisk her away.  
  
  
When she arrives on the other side, she’s in a blank white room with a mirrored ceiling. A large metallic machine behind her sucks the anomaly back into it just as her feet hit the ground. Raven, Echo, Miller and Gabriel are waiting for her by the only door in the space. And Raven looks relieved, as if she didn’t think Clarke would make it through. Miller smiles, as if he knew that she would.  
  
  
And as they step outside and are faced with a group of armed figures, she is the one that fires the first bullet to take them down. And as she fights yet again, she knows she would fight some more- to fight for the boy who defeated all logical odds and brought her back to life only days before.  
  
  
And as they reach the room they know he’s being held in and she is ushered forward by Echo, who simply says “You’d be the one he’d want to see first,” Clarke knows that no matter how tired she is, she would fight a thousand more wars for the boy on the other side of the door.  
  
  
Because above everything else, Bellamy Blake was her greatest strength. And she would be damned if she ever stopped fighting for him.   
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Please do leave comments and kudos if you enjoyed this one!! Would love to know what you thought and what your thoughts and speculations on season 7 are? Much love to you all! Thank you for reading. Stay healthy x


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